Shift excitement for the 21st of July, 2015

Yes, folks...we have some stories about our shift at Michaels tonight.
I had just clocked in, stopped in framing to ask the mgr. what I would be doing tonight. Just as he was telling me, we heard glass breaking in the front of the store. A large frame fell out of a customers cart and broke. First item of business...get the broom and dustpan. They felt real bad, and I told her it was okay...it's not the first time.
Next up, a customer wanted some "crackle." IF you've never used it, it's pretty awesome, provided you want something to look old. I knew there was some in the craft paint aisle, so I went over there. Gal in framing said there was also some in fine arts. So, we were all over the store. I found the one the customer wanted and gave it to her. THEN she says to me, "How does it work? What do I do?" Now when she asked for it, I figured she knew. OH NO! She saw it on.....wait....for...it....PINTEREST!!! So, now I'm telling her how it works. She asks how I know all of this, and I explain I've used it many times, which I have. After the third time of explaining I'm pretty sure she has it down.
A very nice woman who spoke as much English as I speak Spanish needed help. Finally figured out she wanted carbon/graphite paper. So I showed her where that was. Thankful for the Spanish I know.
Next I was helping get the line down up front. A woman with two small boys was buying some things with her "gift card." She says, "I hope this covers it because I don't have any money." BUT she had other things she was going to purchase. Hmmmmm....so I ring up the first pile and she hands me the gift card, which wouldn't scan. DANG! AND the line is building. So, I get to hand type it in. The card covered all but eleven cents. "OH! I have that in the car. I'll be right back." AND she takes the two boys and leaves. Meanwhile, I'm left with a line and her stuff. The next people in line are at the adjoining register. After they are done ringing, he hands me a dime and a penny. So, I finish her purchase, and give everything to my coworker. Just as I'm headed out on the floor, the woman comes back in with her little boys. I tell her another customer paid the rest, she takes her things and leaves...and I get to put the other stuff away. You just HAVE to love it. Keeps me busy.
I head past the magazine/candy section and find a magazine right on top of the candy. Exactly opposite is where it goes. I ponder for a moment...WHY can you take a magazine out and then just drop it on the candy. You haven't even moved a step. WOW!!! What ever...I put it back.
Heading up one of the main aisles I go to put some candles away and there is a Halloween....OH!!!! I forgot to mention...YES, there is Halloween merchandise in the store. Christmas next week I'm sure. Anyway, there is a Halloween candelabra in the middle of the candle section, ON THE FLOOR. Just sitting there in all of it's glory. Lovely.
Over the headset the cashier is asking the MOD about an issue with a customer. "The item is clearance and they want to know IF they can also get another 70% off?!?!" NO. Double NO. Not now, not ever, never. Once it is clearance, that's it. NOT what anyone said, just what we are all thinking. EVEN the cashier. WE ask on the headset, even when we know, because we like everyone to know just what we are dealing with up there. It's more to add some humor to our doldrums.
THEN there was this HOT dad who had some rather, OH how shall I say this, unruly, boys? Maybe that's a good word. Others come to mind, but what ever. One of them just about ran me into the wall. There were three of them; they might have been between the ages of 9 and 12. Anyway, HE was going to make a birthday cake for one of them. He did what ALL the women do, showed me a picture of the cake on his phone. I'm pretty impressed about this. NOT that I know much about it, but it was a MINECRAFT cake. He was going to bake a chocolate cake, and then he wanted to make these bricks out of the candy melts. Did we "have a mold to melt the candy melts in and make them squares?" So, I showed him this silicone individual brownie maker. He was impressed with that and decided it would work. I was impressed he was doing that. It reminded me of my boys.
I think one of the things which drives me crazy is when a customer comes up to me and the first thing out of their mouth is, "You don't have......" whatever. IF you know we don't have it why are you asking for it? OR IF you don't know, why are you telling me we don't when you don't know yet. Rephrase it please. "DO you have......" I sometimes feel link saying, "Nope...we don't."
Then there is this line...used with a LOT of hand movements, "Do you have....I don't know what they are called....but..." and they are waving their hands all over showing sizes, etc. Pretty funny. I ask them to describe whatever it is and what they are going to use it for. AND when I take them to it, they are flabbergasted. "HOW did you know?" they ask. I always tell them I speak craftese. NO, that's not a work, but it is a language. I guess since there isn't anything I haven't used or do in the store, I just know.
Then as I went around a corner, a five year old girls whines to her mother, "I'm bored." AND I wonder how many places that mom has been with said child today, which was for said child and the mom had to wait...
Now, about 6:30 three guys came in, headed to the side of the store and hurried down the side wall aisle. The minute I saw them I KNEW they were up to no good. I just "felt" it. I alerted the MOD on the headset to watch them. About half an hour later the store phone rang. I answered it and the woman explained that she had just made some purchases and was in the parking lot. She and the others she shopped with saw "three guys putting things under their shirts, and there is a black Nissan out here waiting for them." Code red! I told the MOD about the call and she went out to the parking lot to get the license number...and that car drove off SO FAST!!!!!!! Back to the store and she rounded them up. Asked the one kid for his backpack and we put it behind my register. It was empty. Who carries an empty backpack around IF you aren't going to fill it?!?!!? AND so the stalking begins. AND they decide to leave. She follows and gets the license plate number this time.
There are some nights I dread going to work; actually MOST of the time. I love the merchandise and the people I work with. LOVE to go into the classroom when Lenora has a cake decorating class, just to smell the sugar. There are things which make the evening interesting. AND then there is the side of society which makes me wonder about people and ethics. Some are driven by greed; they either just steal things outright, OR they want SO many discounts as to get it free...they might as well steal it. A woman got mad tonight when the MOD explained the coupon rules. The woman was unimpressed and got angry. OH well.....tomorrows another night.