24 December 2024

This has been a very different Christmas in some ways. Yet it has been similar to a few Christmases long ago. Please know that ALL of us in The Hermitage are just fine. This year has just been "different" in so many ways. Several of us have talked to others who feel this was a difficult year. They, as well as all of us in The Hermitage, hope that next year will be different. 

Decorator did NOT decorate. There is no tree. There is no nativity. No wreath. No bells. No candles. No garland. No gifts. No stockings. No nothing. There ARE lights out front in the yard. They are pretty and remind us of years past. We have enjoyed them. Decorator is NOT a scrooge. None of us are. Things just didn't happen this year.

Correspondent didn't send out Christmas cards. Yes, THIS is unusual. Perhaps Happy New Year cards are in order? Time will tell. She did get out the Christmas cards, but time slipped by.

Seamstress did no sewing.

Builder didn't make any cute things. 

Crafter and Artist did do anything.

Baker and Chef DID make treats and gave them to others. This is a tradition that goes WAY back to when Queen was a child. The Queen Mum always made treats, and plates of goodies were taken to the neighbors. The tradition of the "fruitcake" however, stopped with The Queen Mum. 

As we look back on this year, we are overlooking the rough spots and have focused on the blessings, joys, triumphs, and things we just got through because ALL of us in The Hermitage persevered. We have decided that we are SO blessed. We know the true meaning of Christmas, and that means more to us than anything else. We get together with family frequently, and that means everything. We have The Hermitage, and enjoy incredible comforts within it, and in the yard. We've had food to eat all year. We've been blessed to enjoy good health. We have incredible neighbors and friends. We have faith, hope and our beliefs. We really want for nothing. The things we have prayed for have been given to us. Disciple has had the opportunity to serve in the Temple for a year now and that has been an incredible blessing. Yes, WE are ALL blessed, and humbled by all of the blessings. 

We are thankful that God loved us SO much, He provided a way back. He gave ALL of US His only begotten son. 

All of us in The Hermitage wish you all a very Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Season's Greetings, and Happy New Year. May you find how you've been blessed, and overlook the trials and challenges. Most of us are blessed far more than we think of daily. 

 20 December 2022

On November 20th, 2022 the Hermitage took “the” hit. The following week none of us felt like eating or drinking, bringing the “group” even further down a discouraging path of despair that we knew.

This is NOT a plea, or anything else, for anything really. Several people have questioned our disappearance (THANK YOU), and while we are still recuperating, Writer is going to try and convey thoughts, experiences, epiphanies, realizations, blessings, etc. This may be long.

On November 25th we were taken to Urgent Care, by a great friend; multiple tests, liquids, etc., where we were told all tests came out perfect and our diagnosis was—we have “L O N G” covid. Since then many others have enlightened us on their experiences with this post covid disability, which experiences we have welcomed with an open mind, and embraced many of them. We did not experience some of the well-known symptoms; fever, runny nose, aches, pain, headaches, etc. We have basically experienced loss of appetite, shakes, some dizziness, lethargy, and basically debilitating energy. This has taken EVERYTHING out of ALL of us here at the Hermitage.

Employee tried to work; Monday went okay, for the most part, Tuesday and Wednesday, she only made it halfway, Thursday went fairly well and because it went SO well, we ALL thought we were passed this, ONLY to have Friday end up back at square one, and worse. Dignity Health came by the house, did a blood test, and various other evaluations. Everything was fine. They told us we just need to “rest” and lay low. EGADS!!! Employee is out until January of 2023. Frustrated, especially since grades were due on the 16th of December and it turned out that she is the only one who could run the grades report. She continually checked the grades on the 15th and 16th, reporting on the posting process, which was completed a little after 3PM, and we were SO thankful.

Writer has been trying to journal; handwriting is shaky and the shaky hands hit double on the keyboard, making a red squiggly line under everything. She is VERY frustrated by all of this. She looks at her handwriting, which used to bring “A’s” in penmanship, and wonders how or IF Calligrapher will ever be able to do that again? Please excuse anything you may spot.

The following is in no particular order. Writer has jotted notes as they have come to her.

Patient has NO patience for this. She, as well as the rest of us here, are frustrated, weary, yet have found GREAT compassion and love for others who deal with health issues on a daily basis, month after month, year after year. We honor you, and Disciple has included you even more in her prayers. We can’t imagine what you are dealing with. May God bless you. Patient is going to work with the rest of us in helping us get our strength back and getting us all back in working order.

In order to rest, you basically do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. This has proven quite difficult for most ALL of us in the Hermitage, as most of us are usually quite active. So, Movie Buff took over, for the most part. We don’t always agree with what she picks, but none of us have much fight in us at this time, so…She has had us watching 7 seasons of Good Witch—SEVERAL times over, old/new movies, squirrel obstacle courses 1.0 and 2.0, some new movies, Christmas movies, Christmas devotionals, and of course Music and the Spoken Word programs and specials. We’ve also watched some ancient ruin documentaries, scripture programs, and when on YouTube, whatever comes up next.

Reader read two books one weekend-The Christmas Box Miracle: My Spiritual Journey of Destiny, Healing and Hope. We ALL felt she was inspired to read this at this time. She’s had it for years, but picked NOW to read it. God's timing is incredible. She also read The Letter. Both old books and both written by R. P. Evans. She was challenged to read Jesus the Christ by Talmadge a few weeks ago, and while she started it decades ago, and never got far, she is on chapter 9. This is NOT an easy read, and with the somewhat “foggy” brain from this post-covid, she is struggling, but keeps on truckin’.

As we have been convalescing, we have been abundantly blessed. Queen’s daughters have brought food, company, electrolytes, treatments, etc. They have been consoling and have blessed us all in many ways. They sat in the ER waiting room for hours. Queen’s sons have supplied moral support and inspirational advice. The oldest came over and watered plants for Gardener. We have had well wishes in the form of text messages, emails, phone calls, messages on Facebook and neighbors have come over to bring things, check on us and see if we need anything. Fresh homemade chicken noodle soup was also provided. To say we have been blessed is an understatement. Tears have flowed freely as love has been shown so overwhelmingly. Compassion, concern, love, blessings have come from family (my own and Church family), friends, neighbors, coworkers, and many others. Thankful is not enough to express feelings. Each came at an apropos time…Gods time.

One of the things we were told by two AMAZING nurses at the ER, was to sit in the sun for half an hour every day. So, being the overachievers we are, every morning we sit out front in our fuzzy pj’s and robe for an hour or two, between 9:30 and noon. This has proven beneficial in many ways. We’ve visited with many neighbors on our cul-de-sac, as well as neighbors who walk our street from other streets in the “Estates.” This has been extra special for Board Member. Yes, we have a “new” person in the Hermitage, she is a new HOA Board Member; she has met people who live in other parts of the Estates, who walk their dogs, ride their bikes, drive or just walk by, and she runs some things by them, which the board is considering. One neighbor stopped and prayed for us, and told us about “grounding”, which we have heard of. Probably in one of Movie Buff’s YouTube assorted shows. So, each morning as we sun ourselves outside in the 39º- 45º weather, NOW we remove our slippers and socks and put our feet in the grass, and “ground” ourselves with mother earth. Many of these encounters proved to be God's timing.

As we sat outside last week, one of the many delivery people who bring packages to our homes, dropped one off here. It was from Queen’s brother in Texas. An unexpected bottle of a debated “medicine” he thought we could try. God's timing. We have been intrigued, and have considered, all of the suggested “remedies”, ideas, and thoughts from others. Another neighbor brought a cup of rice atole last week and pineapple atole tonight. We even tried cutting an onion in half and putting it on the nightstand. That was far too close, as our eyes were burning, so we moved it a little further away. Within half an hour it was back in the kitchen. WOW…powerful onion. We have found that our taste and smell has been overly enhanced by all of this. Spices and herbs are stronger as we eat and we can smell even more acutely than before.

We are grateful for all of the remedies, inspiration, prayers, thoughts, treats, blessings, well-wishing, and everything else.

Correspondent has had time to unsubscribe to a LOT of unnecessary emails we were getting on a daily basis.

We gained a greater appreciation for Gardener and Landscaper. As we sit in the yard, the smell of the roses, lavender, jasmine, rosemary, lemon thyme, alyssum, etc. fill the air as the breeze drifts by. Several times Birder has been excited by just how close the birds fly close to her. Hummingbirds have hovered within 18”, a mockingbird hopped almost as close, as did a yellow finch. The cat next door has finally allowed us to pet him and that was thrilling. We have found a new appreciation for a simple life and the simple things. We are thankful for a home, the comforts and conveniences of a home, yard, flowers, life, and health. Among many other things. The list is long and as we sit each morning, the list continues to grow. More of God's timing.

We pondered, and discussed, WHY in our youth we spend so much time working to buy “things”, which in our latter life we no longer want, need or care about? AND what are we going to do with all of it? Come over, there may be something you want. We thought about what is important in life, and what isn’t. What happens to it when everything is said and done? We pondered giving up all we do…and then when we felt better, regrouped. The conversations were varied, long, crazy, and weird.

Decorator, Shopper, Queen, Grandmomma, and the rest of us in the Hermitage are saddened by the lack of decorations, and spirit of NO Christmas in the domicile. This in NO way means we are seeking others to come over here and do things. Please do NOT take it that way. We are fine. Truly we are. There have been times in past years where this has happened for one reason or another, and we have survived. After all, “It came without ribbons: It came without tags! It came without packages, boxes or bags! Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before! “Maybe Christmas,” he thought, doesn’t come from a store. Maybe Christmas…perhaps…means a little bit more!” And it does. Disciple reminds us of this often. Christmas is something we carry all year. Jenny and Angelo brought over a dwarf evergreen the other day, which Gardener and Landscaper already know where they want to plant in the yard.

Chef misses cooking, although two days ago threw some things together and it came out amazing. We ALL hope she will remember how she threw it together. Baker thinks often of baking as this is when she usually does some heavy duty baking, but next year she will hopefully make up for it. Correspondent hasn’t been able to do Christmas cards…her hands are too shaky.

Then there were the daily/nightly “mind games” this illness brings. And it does bring them. The demons came out and messed with us, more often than we would have liked. Sometimes ALL night long, which were devastatingly LONG, and disturbing. Oh the thinking and overthinking. Things we “need” to do and “have” to do, and things we “want” to do. Long lists. Sleepless nights. Chef was over it one night and at 1:30AM was peeling potatoes for potato soup. The rest of us thought it sounded great, so we didn't protest or think it was crazy. Things would have been fine had she not put the crockpot on high. We did not have potato soup. But the demons were strong some nights. The voices would say, “You are dying. Just…and get it over with.” Movie Buff heard several times a line from a movie, “Bring out your dead!” And then the voice, “I’M NOT DEAD…YET!!!” The battles were heavy, but no casualties. With Disciples help, and our inner strength from angels on both sides of the veil, we fought the demons. We are NOT dead. We have a long way to go and while this has been one of our greater battles, we are winning. We will win. We have so many on our side in this battle and we are SO THANKFUL. God sent them. His timing is so specific. So perfect.

We are more than grateful for the testimony Disciple holds within her heart and spirit. She has carried us during this challenge. Her strength is stronger than any of us realized. As we’ve “rested” for the last month, many challenges, trials, and discouraging times, were revisited. We realized her great strength, and faith in God, and the Savior. Off and on we scrolled for a few minutes, our wall on Facebook to see what was going on. We read of others who are dealing with far worse than we are. Our compassion grew for others who are going through their individual trials and challenges. Through this, Disciple changed her thoughts and prayers. She is having more meaningful discussions with the powers above. We are intrigued with how God changes us. We were reminded by Queen's oldest, of many things, which we know to be true of Disciple. We have learned from her that all things happen for a reason, and all things have a purpose. We know all things happen according to God's timing. We know God loves us, and the Savior loves us. We know, and celebrate this time of year, the gift God gave to us…His Only Begotten Son, our Savior Jesus Christ.

We are SO THANKFUL AND SO BLESSED. Thank you for your messages, thoughts, prayers, remedies, and countless blessings. Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah. Love to all.

 17 Dec 2017

A short update on my mom.

Yesterday she was finally released from Desert Springs Hospital, where the nurses and CNA’s didn’t want her to go. They wanted to keep her. But after 5 hours and much paperwork, she is settled in her next to final home. Over the last 50+ years she has moved almost every year…and loves to move. I hated it. So, I told her for Christmas she got her wish of moving. She seemed to be happy about it. I was less than happy. For me, it was a very emotional move. It was a move that signaled the beginning of the last chapter she will have here on earth. She’s had many chapters in her life, filled with many people, places and happenings. I was maybe a little selfish, maybe, in not wanting this chapter to come. When I read books, sometimes I read the last page of the last chapter. Yes, call it wrong, but I do it. SO, I know how this chapter ends…and while I know what happens after this chapter, I just didn’t want it to come to this. I wanted her to be able to not go through this part. I wanted her to remember things, be vibrant and social till the end. But that isn’t the case. I wanted “us” to fix the past and have a relationship most mothers and daughters have. But that isn’t the case either. But she is doing okay and this will be okay.

Actually, it was a prayer answered. This is not an easy situation, as those of you who have had the challenge will attest. I’ve had a lot of things to deal with physically and watching what she has been going through has been difficult for me mentally and emotionally. Yet through it all, she has dealt with things smiling and oblivious of what is going on around her, in the world or anywhere else. So, I’ve prayed about what to do. In the last few days, I’ve made and received countless calls from case workers, social workers, friends, family, nurses, CNA’s, hospice advocates, and care workers. Just wanting and trying to do what is right.

Friday morning I prayed for direction. Those of you who aren’t religious may not find any credence to this, but that’s where I go to give thanks, look for direction, answers and anything else. I’ve had a lot of experience with this and I know that prayer works. So, I prayed that I would be guided in finding a place that would be best for her. She was transported to “this place” yesterday. I couldn’t believe it when I got there. She is one of 6 there and I felt so at peace when I got there just before she did. I was doing paperwork and they took her to her room. When I went into the room I was amazed! Her bed is next to the east window…in view of ALL incoming planes! She can look out that window all day and watch the planes land! For those of you who know how she LOVES to do this, you will understand. I KNOW that God knows each of us personally and individually. He knows who we are, He knows our thoughts, our desires, our hearts, and He loves each of us. He has answered my prayers countless times and I’ve been so thankful that this prayer was answered so completely and quickly. At least one of her nurses is LDS and was helpful with questions I had.

As I stood with her in her room, she began talking like she understood and was fine. She said, “You need to clean out my other place and take what is there. It isn’t much, but do what you want with it.” I thought about what was there…her life…all of the places she has lived and been. I thought about all of the places I’ve lived with her and houses we’ve lived in…and all of the moves. Then she said, “Make sure you get my china.” Hmmmm…I would love to. She got this “china” when she got married in the mid 40’s. As a child growing up, I was the one who learned how to hand wash the “special” china. I helped pack the china each time we moved; this china has moved at least three dozen times, twice across the Pacific Ocean. I was the one who set the table with it when we had company. I was the one it was promised to and the one who was supposed to get it at this time in life. So, when she mentioned the china, I thought of where the china is at this time and yes, I’m angry. The people who have it should NEVER have taken it. Family things belong in the family…as these people well know. My aunt asked for a rocking chair that belonged to their father (her brother) when he died. He said she could have it, but wasn’t given the rocking chair. While I know we “can’t take it with us,” I also know that they never ate off that china. My children grew up eating off of the china. They would be the ones who would get it when I leave. This china is really what my mother considers “all” of her earthly possessions. She doesn’t have anything else anymore. With all of her moves, things have been lost, broken or whatever. BUT the china…it was always packed with the greatest care. She treasured this china and I grew up with the same great care for it, knowing that one day I would have it…and then one of my children. So, when she mentioned the china, which not only surprised me, but rattled my nerves, I didn’t know what to say. She made me promise to continue to take care of it and “make sure you wash it by hand!” Okay…would love to have it. Every time we use it, we would think of her. I would think of all of those who ever ate on them. The memories are plentiful and special…sort of like the china itself. The china was something she loved more than anything, and because of that, I have a great love for it.

And just as quickly as she was mostly lucid…she went on to ask if I had seen Otis lately? No, I hadn’t. What about Wendell? No…I haven’t seen him either. Otis was the oldest of the 8 children, and Wendell was two down from her. She had 6 brothers and a sister. All are gone except for my mom and her brother Howard, who is 16 years younger than she.

So, she is doing okay, for the most part. She realizes that she is in that final chapter as well. But she is with others in a small group care home…and can watch the planes all day. I’m so thankful prayers were answered. So thankful she is happy in her own way. I’m glad she isn’t suffering or in pain. I’m glad she is comfortable.

I don't know when or what the next update will be; maybe I will have a special story and more photos. I'll see what I can find.

 16 December 2024

This photo has been on our desktop for over a month. We saw it and it brought back SO many memories and lessons.

Yes, Queen walked with a book on her head MANY times. Head held high. Shoulders back. Stomach in. Feet pointing forward, and one foot in front of the other. You walked gracefully. NO slouching. When walking in heels, the ball of your foot touches the ground first, NOT the heel.

To sit...turn with your back to the seat/chair, and then allow the back of your legs to touch the chair or seat, then gently sit. Legs crossed at the ankles, NEVER the knees. Hands crossed in your lap.

Queen has thought of ALL of the table manners, and all of the certain behaviors one did to be "Ladylike" in life. Do's and Don'ts. The "yes/no ma'am/sir" and please and thank you or no thank you. She was VERY familiar with Emily Post's Book of Etiquette. Children were seen, but not heard. You were polite. You did not talk back. You used proper language. NEVER did you swear. There were certain words you did not use, and they weren't even swear words, BUT highly improper. There were subjects you DID NOT discuss. EVER! What happened behind closed doors, ANYONE'S closed doors, was none of our business. People lived their lives and YOU didn't know about their private lives. It was no one's business. Mind your own business.

Tomboy was NEVER very impressed with all of this, and had very little use for any of it. She was basically out of control. The Queen Mum was NEVER very impressed with the antics of Tom Boy. She was always muddy and dirty from playing in the garden mud puddles or dirt, or greasy from working on cars. The latter infuriated The Queen Mum. Tomboy loves cars. What can she say?!

Model used most of it often. Especially the NO wild nail colors. That was a no-no when doing hand photography.

Now and then some of us in The Hermitage STILL remember, and still do these things. Table manners are ALWAYS used. We wonder IF those who experience hip issues weren't taught to walk a certain way, and that is why they may have these hip problems? Just something we have wondered. We have to work hard and not look at how others do these things, especially when they are NOT in compliance with what The Queen Mum expected. SHE was very critical. Life was not easy, that's for sure. Queen always seemed to be a disappointment to The Queen Mum. The Queen Mum wore hats that matched her outfit, and gloves, with matching shoes and purses. She was always dressed to the nines! She wore "slacks" but they always matched the jacket. Queen STILL remembers when The Queen Mum first wore a pair of jeans! OH MY GOSH! You would have thought the world ended. That was in the early 70's. Right around the time when Scholar was allowed to wear pants to school. Before that, she and the other girls always had to wear dresses or skirts. She would be absolutely horrified to see what Shopper sees when she goes to Walmart. OR anywhere else. Times have changed. Life is different. We are sure there are some places where these things are still the norm. The Hermitage still has "rules" but some are bent. We are over it. IF our Prince arrives, he will have to take us as we are.

 3 Dec 2017

As a woman of age, there are many things on my mind, and have been for some time now. So, I’m going to weigh in on this whole sexual harassment issue. Mind you, these are my opinions and thoughts. I’ve pondered them for some time. I’ve thought about things that happened in high school; no, I’m not going to list any names. I’ve thought of college classes, remarks from other students…and others. I’ve thought of places I’ve been, situations I’ve been in, jobs, work, co-workers, friends, etc. I’ve thought of how we “flirt” when we are young…and old. I’ve thought about foolish things I’ve done which thankfully ended far better than they could have. I’ve thought about guys/men who have whistled at me and I just smiled and waved…like the penguins in Madagascar. I’ve thought about modeling and TV/Movie/commercials and clothes I was asked to wear. Most of the time they were modest and things were fine. A few, I refused to read for and was told I wouldn’t get the part. So be it. Somewhere along the way in these last 62 years I’ve found my “worth” and would never have felt comfortable doing things which are contrary to my spirit.

I must say that I admire the words and courage of Mayim Bialik and Angela Lansbury. They didn’t come out and say what others are saying; they came out with opinions unlike those of many others, opinions much like mine, oddly enough. Here I thought I was the only one. But I am somewhat pleased to be in their company.

So, these are my thoughts as a woman, mother and grandmomma.

Let’s look at ALL the things “geared” towards sex and what drives people…mostly women, to shop for things so they “look sexy.”

First of all there is music. I love music. Most kinds of music. Enter Rock-N-Roll. I took a History of Rock-N-Roll class at CCCC in 1991. Maybe some of you know where the term came from, but on the off chance you don’t, I grabbed one off the net. Just random. If you want to google it, or whatever, feel free to do so. Here’s what wiktionary has to say: “Etymology—From rock (move back and forth) + and + roll; originally a verb phrase common among African Americans, meaning "to have sexual intercourse"; it was a euphemism that appeared in song titles since at least 1914 (Trixie Smith's "My Man Rocks Me With One Steady Roll"). So, if you are listening to RnR all day…as some of us are (me), you are being subjected to a lot of sexual innuendoes. I won’t go in to all of the other music genre’s out there, suffice it to say, it’s pretty much the same more or less.

Next up, billboards. Now I live in Las Vegas, so the billboards here are a far cry from what you may see elsewhere in the world. BUT let me say this. Women are portrayed as objects of pleasure and they are wearing very little. The billboards are more of an invitation than anything else.

A few years ago many of the women I knew were raving about a book—50 Shades of Gray. Why wasn’t I reading it they asked? Well…not my kind of reading material. BUT they all loved it and couldn’t wait for the movie to come out, or the sequel. This is just one book of many. Then there are magazines, newspaper articles, new stories and the like. Have you ever read the way some women advertise themselves in the singles columns of the want ads??? Hmmmm…

I remember when I was growing up and watching TV…and then somewhere that all changed. TV shows changed. Society changed. What you say and couldn’t say changed. And no, I didn’t watch the afternoon soaps, but I know they were and are filled with sex in one way or another. And then there are commercials. Do I dare mention that I don’t eat at one of the fast food restaurants because I just can’t figure out what that girl in a bikini has to do with anything? NOT that this is the only commercial geared towards sex rather than the product. Why is it that companies and advertisers choose sex as a way to sell their products? A burger is NOT a condom! And while we are on the subject of restaurants, what about Hooters? Yes, I’ve heard they have great wings. But they advertise something else. For those of you who have not been to Vegas and waltzed through the casinos, hotels or any other place on the strip, I’m here to tell you that you have gambling…and sex. Yes, there is food and entertainment. But what is the entertainment? I go for the Fountains at the Belliago.

There is a nail salon on the corner advertising “Sexy Nails.” My mom asked how nails could be sexy. I didn’t answer and don’t want to know. Although I have to admit it’s a valid question.

And I’ve gone clothes shopping. How many times have you heard a woman say, “OH! I want this! I will look SO sexy in this!!!” or something very similar. I know there are times when I want to look great in something. I asked Jenny to pick out some glasses for me which would make me look sassy. Not sure that’s the same as sexy. In high school they may have put me in the nerd or geek group. But I like them.

So, it seems that everything is geared towards sex and no one says anything or cares…until someone acts on it. AND it seems that it’s acted upon more than anyone ever thought, or dreamed. Where has everyone been? Hiding with their heads in the sand? This has been going on for centuries. Sadly, some countries have cultures where this is the norm.

It’s funny…sort of, but as I’m writing this I’ve been picturing Dana Carvey as the Church Lady saying, “Satan, Satan, Satan!” While that’s funny and I loved watching the Church Lady, it’s interesting how many things were spot on. The longer I live, the more I have watched these social lines move from one place to the next. NOT that they moved far or fast. For the most part the lines moved a little bit at a time and ever so carefully. But I could see where they were headed and it was more than eminent. Now others are seeing things through different eyes and they don’t like it. But once you move a line, it’s hard to get that back. It’s like the adage, “Give them an inch and they take a mile.” We’ve gone miles from where we were. No one liked where we were and didn’t mind the change…now they do.

Two stories come to mind. The first. There was this guy; a pretty important guy. He was looking out his window and saw a woman bathing. She was beautiful. I don’t think she knew he saw her, but he did. AND he like what he saw. He liked it a LOT. And he sent for her. AND even though she was married and loved her husband a lot, she slept with this guy; as He was important and commanded many. Time goes by and she realizes she is pregnant. So, she goes back to him and tells him. He commands her husband to come home and sleep with her in hopes that things will be okay. BUT the husband is loyal to this guy…this guy who slept with his wife and got her pregnant. Hmmm…the guy doesn’t figure on this. SO, he sends him out to the front lines in the war and he is killed. She ends up marrying this guy…King David. Her name was Bathsheba.

The second story I thought of is about two absolutely decadent cities; so vile, evil and wicked. IF fifty were found to be good, the cities wouldn’t be destroyed; but 50 couldn’t be found, nor could 40, 30 or 20. In the end not even 10 could be found. And so we have the story of the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. Lot and his family, except for his wife we able to leave.

I started working for the CCSD in 1986. I remember hearing a table of 5th graders asking each other who was still a virgin. Was I shocked? YES I WAS! At the time my oldest was a 5th grader. I was horrified. We will fast forward to last week. I’m listening to middle schoolers and how sexually active they are. Random kids having sex with random partners; yes, they are sexually active and see nothing wrong with it. They see sexuality in their video games, movies, TV shows, etc. Some of their parents have never been married and have different partners frequently. Will any of these kids file sexual harassment charges 40 years from now? I doubt it. Having sex means nothing to them. It’s like eating lunch or going to the movies. Their lines have moved so far they never knew there was a line.

Have I heard sexually harassing things at work? You bet; in two school districts, four different Michael’s, 7 catering companies, and many movie, TV, and commercial sets. When I was modeling I heard a lot as well. Some of it’s been directed at me, and some of it has been verbalized to me but directed at others. AND I’ve heard it equally from just as many men as women.

Is there an answer? I have some. I know how I feel about all of this. I know there are weirdos, pervs and freaks. I also know that people will be people. What you allow in your life will be your life. You can be cautious. You can make choices. It’s all up to you. How you act, how you portray yourself, how you speak, how you respect yourself all tells a story. For some their actions, words, dress, etc. is just advertising. I know some of you won’t agree with me. That’s fine. These are just my thoughts and opinions. I know I’m not perfect. I know I’ve expressed my thoughts when I’ve seen a hot guy. Haven’t acted on any of it lately…heck. I don’t know that I ever did. This is the woman who as a teenager never kissed on the first date. Heck. There are guys I went out with who never got a kiss. There was this one guy who did steal one when I didn’t expect it though. I was surprised, and it never happened again.

So, there you have it. I also have my thoughts on where all of this is headed. I’ll hold those thoughts though. Just like I kept all the names quiet.

3 December 2024

Additional thoughts 7 years later.

Yes, this was seven years ago, but thought about for more years than that. Yesterday Organizer found a newspaper clipping from "Dear Abby" that was kept, maybe to be found just at this time. Her answer to the writer about the difference between "having sex" and "making love" was:

"In "having sex," the name of the game is sexual gratification. It's a selfish, physical exercise in which the partner can be a faceless object. (Anyone will do.)

In "making love," one is motivated by a desire to give pleasure, express deep affection and communicate one's feelings of caring. It's the ultimate in sharing. I "making love," the partner must be a special person. (No one else will do.) Love is a metropolis. Sex is a whistle-stop."

The Hermitage is on the outskirts of the "Las Vegas Strip" and the things we SEE when we leave are not unusual to us. BUT might blow the minds of others who live elsewhere. Women's bodies are everywhere. And have very little on. We find it sad. Nevertheless, it is there. To us it is a basic lack of respect. Some women, for whatever reason, have no respect for their bodies, or themselves. THEY make that choice. They consciously choose to exploit themselves. The things they choose to wear OR not wear. They way they walk. The way they talk, etc. THEY put themselves in a position that leads to other consequences. It is a dangerous, and precarious choice.