Financial Roller Coaster

My parents lived during the depression. My mom was born in 1919 and my dad in 1920. Money was treated completely differently for them. If they saw the things I see at school everyday, they would both be aghast. I've seen students throw their coins in the trash because, "they aren't worth anything" or "don't want to bother with it".
My mother is still the miser, and rightfully so. Even though she doesn't need to watch and account for every penny, at the age of 94, she still balances her checkbook every month...to the penny. She knows where she spends every penny, and probably knows where she spent her first one.
So, as a child, I was taught the respect for money; I was taught to "pay myself" by saving 10%, give 10% and to always pay my bills. I was taught NOT to spend more than I made, and the difference between "NEEDS" and "WANTS". I was taught how to budget and the value of coupons and comparison shopping.
I did NOT receive an "allowance". I did have "jobs" I was expected to do, just for the privileged of living in the home. We were a family and everyone was expected to help make that family and home run smoothly.
All of these teachings have been very valuable to me. When the kids were growing up, they helped make up the monthly menu, helped make the grocery list, and went to the market; each had a shopping cart. One for meats and produce, one for dairy and cold things, one for canned and dry goods, and one had the miscellaneous items. We shopped once a month for the majority of the groceries, BUT we made trips to the market during the week for milk and bread. They went through two gallons of milk a day, and I swore I was going to buy a cow, but never did. When we got home, they helped bring everything in and put it away.
When times were lean, I've known what I can do with out. Because of the things I learned as a child, when there were hard times, I've survived. In the summer, I keep the thermostat at 78 to 80 degrees and turn the fan on; in the winter, I keep the heater set at 68ish and put more blankets on the bed and keep a hoodie on. I have learned the value of paying yourself. Having a savings has come in quite handy over the years.
The biggest blessing is the giving of 10% in tithing. I have done this since I was about 10 years old and started babysitting. I can't even count the times I have been blessed by obeying this principle. In the scriptures, in Malachi 3:10, I learned: "Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it." I can tell you this is true. I have been blessed over, and over, and over again...countless times. Even though I keep my ledger up to date and balance my statement; you can NOT do all that I had to do to raise four children and make ends meet with what I had. Many unexpected "things" happened. Many blessings came our way. We were blessed continually.

The scars from the pains of life

There are all sorts of pains; physical, financial, mental, and emotional. THEY all can be large and small, and short or long, etc. I've overcome financial pains frequently, as well as physical...the other two seem to be much more difficult. 

Life has a way of changing from minute to minute. One minute you are fine, yet something happens to you, or someone who secondarily affects your life, and bingo, your life changes. Sometimes this happens suddenly without notice, or gradually, with plenty of notice. Yet either way, sometimes the pain  is SO great, it's hard to overcome.

Physical pains, for me, have come and gone throughout my life. The first physical pain, which I do NOT remember, happened the day after my first birthday. I've been told about it numerous times, BUT only have the scar to  remind me daily of what I don't remember. It seems that not long after moving to Hawaii we were still living at the Royal Hawaiian Hotel, waiting for our home to be finished. My dad had taken me down to the lobby to wait for my mother, who was getting ready for what ever it was we were going to do. Those details have never been related when this story was told; only that my dad and I were in the lobby and he was reading the paper. Apparently I was standing/jumping on the couch, fell and landed on the corner of the glass coffee table, splitting the end off of my cute little nose. No one was sued. No glass coffee table manufacturers were told to put warnings on their tables. No couch manufacturers were told to put warnings on their couches. The only thing that happened was...I became the youngest person ever to have a nose job...probably. HAHA! I'm sure it was painful, yet I remember nothing. Knowing my dad and how he is, I'm sure he fainted. Over the next few years I would collect several more scars on my knees, head, elbows, etc. from falling, running, jumping, flying, or trying to, etc. Yes, I was a tomboy; climbing coconut trees, playing "Cops and Robbers" or "Cowboys and Indians" or "Army", trying to be "superman", football, baseball, rollerskating. It became commonplace for me to receive a wound one way or the other. I had two black eyes one summer from playing "Hotbox". I've had other black eyes, but we won't go in to that.

Most physical pains just leave scars; then there are those which can also leave emotional scars as well. 

When I was about six years old, we were visiting relatives in California. My uncle was building apartments, and they were at the stage of having walls, etc. but no carpet, just the concrete floors. Several of my cousins and I were playing hide and seek. I was running to the base when the cousin who was "it" pushed me down and broke the corner off of my top tooth, which was just coming in. The other one was already out, and hadn't started coming back in. I picked up the piece and took it in to the house and showed my parents. While my aunt was making a phone call to the dentist, I heard my mother say, "Well, now she is damaged and no one will want her". My real first emotional scar was forming. 

I've broken a couple of toes, but nothing major. I've had stitches, but only a few here and there. Kidney stones have come and gone. NEVER believe any hospital staff who says they are like being in labor! NOT!!! I repeat...NOT!!!! It is NOT like being in labor. I've been in labor four times; two weighed pounds one ounce, one was 8 pounds 11 ounces and the other 8 pounds 4 ounces. My longest labor was with the last one, which was induced against my wishes; the shortest labor was around an hour and a half. The pain comes and goes and you have a child when it's all said done. Kidney stones are completely different! The pain is unbearable; so unbearable I have passed out. It's unquestionably excruciating. No doubt about it. AND when it finally does pass, you have this 6mm stone with all of these pokey barbs on it. NOT good!!! 

I've had a couple of surgeries. My tonsils were removed when I was about six. The fear of a mask on my face left a mental scar that erupted later in life when I was learning to scuba dive. NOT a good thing. That was another horrifying experience. I also went through a partial hysterectomy at the age of 28. Then a cyst removal on my hand when I was 29. Finally had my wisdom teeth removed when I was 30. Other than that, I am blessed, AND so thankful, to experience incredible health!!!

While physical pain leaves a scar of sorts, the memory fades and, for the most part, you are fine. You remember going through each thing, but the memory fades and sometimes the stories are funnier and funnier. 

AND so, my next blog will be about financial pains...

Singleness...is that a word?

Most days I am okay with my singleness. I get up, get ready for work, enjoy my job and co-workers, as well as most all of the students and things that happen during the day. Geeze, I listen to the various bands play music all day...fun music. The band director is funny and the kids love him. It's great.
This morning, as I prepared to go to the Jazz Festival, I went over and above my usual attire...I wore a hat. It's a cool hat. Not really where I'm going with this whole thought thing though...so back to the tracks. I find I derail myself several times in writing and talking...trying to get past that.
Anyway, my little Lucas spent the night. WHAT A JOY HE IS! Jenna too, but she's still small, sort of and not spending the night as often as Lucas does. I got him up and in the car...driving him home, which he didn't want to do, we sang the ABC song, talked about buses, and enjoyed the short, albeit, fun ride. After leaving him with Jess, I started off to the LVA...downtown Vegas...the OLD LVHS. I wasn't in any hurry; took the long way and wove in and out of the streets of Vegas on my way downtown. Went past some of the old haunts, and thought about the kids, fire stations, and how things have changed here in the last 40 years. A LOT!!! And my singleness came around on the tracks...I pondered that I looked pretty cool today; cute black and white flip skirt with a black lacy top and white blouse, black and white accessories, my black suede heels, and my cute hat. I started wondering if there was anyone out there who thought I was attractive? Why am I single? Why, after being married for 16 years, and divorcing in 1991, hasn't there been someone "worthy" of my company? What's wrong with me? Is there something wrong with me? I do shower every day...brush my teeth. What's the deal???
Tonight I watched Eat, Pray, Love...I've forgiven everything. I've moved on. I don't hate anyone. I don't know what happened...I don't know that anyone does. Where is the guy who wants to take me to an island...who will pack my things and want me? Is there someone out there I can wear lacy things for? I really would LOVE to have someone hold me...tell me it will be alright. Someone who thinks I'm worth spending time with. Someone who wants to hold my hand, walk with me, talk with me, to me...someone who will accept me as I am, and not want me to change. Someone who will love me for who I have become. Someone who enjoys life as much as I do and all it has to offer.
These are the things I ponder from time to time. It isn't often I ponder my singleness, and it isn't for very long. It usually ends with tears streaming down my face. BUT I recover quickly and move on. I try not to do feel this way in front of anyone, or when anyone is around. I get up in the morning and put my good attitude on with my good thoughts, get dressed and tell myself, "It's going to be a GREAT day!" And, for the most part, it is.

Jenna

 Jenna arrived on September 18th, 2012 at 2:37 am. She weighed 9 pounds 15 ounces and was 21 1/2 inches long. She is precious and Lucas is very gentle with her. It is so cute. At the moments she sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, sleeps, eats, gets diapered, and I think she smiled at me the other day!!!!! The "girls" (her mom and Aunt JB) are having even more fun taking pictures of her and dressing her up!
I had a horrible moment in Babies R Us right after she was born...

...we were in the little girl section of clothes and Jess was looking at all of the fancy Christmas dresses, etc. I LOVED sewing for my children, especially the girls. I always made these matching dresses for them. It was one of the joys of having girls. I saved all the patterns with the hopes of someday making darling things for my grandchildren...now that time is here...and all of my sewing things are in storage...I got caught up in my frustrations of life and emotions started to flow from my heart to my eyes...and out. I am still not over it, and can't wait to have a home where I can create once again.
So, this is our Jenna...the new little princess in our kingdom. She will have many princess dresses, and might carry a sword. I am hoping that she and Lucas will have cousins one of these days...months...years..

Lucas

I just realized when I was checking out my blog, I have missed writing about some very important events. ONE was becoming a grandmother for the first time.
The anticipation was indescribable! THEN when it finally happened, well...words can not express...or at least I haven't found words great enough to express my feelings...except to say, I am blessed!

Lucas was born on May 15th, 2011 at 2:27 am. He weighed 9 pounds 6 ounces and was 20 1/2 inches long. I knew when we all found out that Jess was pregnant, that this child would change ALL of our lives, and he has. When he was a baby, we tried taking turns holding him at family events, BUT we could usually find him in the arms of his uncles...Mike and Bobby. It was a rare occasion that someone else had him. He is so loved!
Because he has so many grandparents, the distinguishing of grandma/pa this and grandma/pa that was doled out to the various grandparents...I became Meemaw. I love the Big Bang Theory and it just sort of stemmed from that.
He is now 17 months and not only is one of my biggest joys, but he is a big brother to Jenna...another blog coming up.

The happy Graf family!!!

Uncle Mike

Aunt Katie 

 

 

                                

Uncle Bobby

Aunt JB

The girls, Lucas' mom Jess and his Aunt JB saw this Viking hat and since I am the one who crochets, I was elected to make it. It is cute, we had fun with it!

So, these are some pretty random photos of Lucas from the past year. If I knew what I was doing on here, I would have some type of order. Maybe with Jenna I will figure it out!!!

 

Aunt JB has taken most of these photos...it was hard to find one with her in it. BUT she and Jess have an incredible amount of fun dressing Lucas up for his monthly photo shoot. The Superman and the phone booth was his 1 year old photo! It's one of my favorites!
I am fortunate to live so close to them. I get to see him frequently! AND he comes to visit me. When we part, there are big tears...first his, then mine. I love him so much! He is an incredible part of our family!

The dreaded house hunting!

I really thought when my home in St. Jo, MO FINALLY sold in late January of this year, that I would be in my new home by my birthday! NOT!!!! Here it is almost October and I am still, basically, homeless. Most all of my things have been in storage since June of 2008! The rest of it since March of this year! I have moved from St. Jo, to Utah...then back to Vegas; I've moved four times since moving back to Vegas. Twice with Jessica and Jason, once in a rental home and now at Jenny's.
When I finally was qualified to buy a home, I found that most of the homes had been snarfed up by investors! They would buy them, put in carpet and paint, then flip them for twice what they paid! There is a group of investors who do their homes the same way...I have seen literally dozens of their homes...the sad things is they paint the kitchen and bathroom cabinets black...which isn't a bad thing, but they paint them black inside and out...drawers too!!! THEN they painter guy/gal shuts them...and when someone comes to look at the home and tries to open the drawers/cabinets they are painted shut! Yep!!! Someone even pulled off the drawer front trying to open it! GEEZE!!! Are you serious! I just can't believe it. THEN there are the homes which are highest and best. Fifty people will put a bid on a home. I tried to look at one home where there was a tenant. Never did get to see it. You could only see if between three and four on Tuesday or Wednesday. WOW! THEN there are the homes where the people destroyed the home before being foreclosed on. NO cabinets, appliances, sinks, toilets, water heater, outlets, ceiling lights, closet doors, inside doors, plumbing ripped out, etc...one even had holes in the walls from the outside to the inside...so the cute little desert chipmunks could come in...probably scorpions and tarantulas as well! Holy cow! There are also some home...quite a few in fact...owned by Bank of America...and they will only let you bid on them if you bank with them. Dorks!
About a month ago, I was at a party HP group party. One of my friends told me that there were about 75,000 homes in a "shadow inventory"; they were going to release them after the election! Hmmmm...I thought I would check this out. So, the following Monday I asked my realtor (I need to write a blog about realtors), about this so called "shadow inventory" I heard about. SURE enough! BUT there aren't just 75,000 homes in this shadow inventory...the realtors have been told there are between 100,000 and 200,000 homes in this shadow inventory!!! WHAT THE HECK!?!?!?!!?!? Now I feel that since it's taken this long to find nothing, I might as well wait 10 more days until after the election just to see what's in this shadow inventory! I was told by my realtor today that they may start releasing them soon...which won't be too soon for me.
Needless to say, the house hunting has been frustrating, discouraging and a downright pain!

Hmmmm....

People are updating their blogs...well, sort of. I LOVE to write, but never think to do this, until someone posts something and I go to read theirs. Not only do I not remember the last thing I posted or wrote about, it took me several minutes to figure out how to post a new writing. GEEZE!!! I need to get with the program.
So, let's see...
I am living at Jenny's home in the, somewhat, middle of Vegas. Bobby is here...he makes life interesting. I'll explain...I have a dog and cat I brought with me from St. Jo, MO. Jade, the dog, is a Chow/Neufie mix, so she is big, black, hairy, and getting pretty old; Archimedes is a Bombay cat, black/sable with white feet, weighs about 20 pounds and rules the roost. He isn't afraid of much. By that I mean, when I babysit Mike's American Pit "Lucy", Archimedes doesn't think twice about snuggling up against her. hehehe...it's pretty funny. Lucy is an incredible dog. ANYWAY, the other animals in our home are: Colby, who is Karin's dog. He is part poodle and I'm not sure what else; not as big as Jade, but bigger than Archimedes...who rubs up against him and just keeps going. Then there is "Spike", the bearded dragon. I think I have a photo I could insert here...if I can figure out how...

Anyway, this is Spike...he's pretty cool and provides entertainment on the "Lizard Channel". Bobby will sit in his chair and the dogs will be somewhere in the house...and all of the sudden, Bobby will say, in a relatively normal voice, "Hey, what's on the Lizard Channel?" Where ever Jade is, she will come running and look inside the aquarium, like Spike is going to do some kind of trick. It's the funniest thing! I thought I had a photo, but alas...NOT! I will have to take one. OR a video. It's a riot.
Then we have the, uhumm... "pets", and I use the term loosely, which I do NOT have pictures of. They are in medium size plastic tubs. IF anyone would like me to post photos of them, I will, but until someone makes a request, I am NOT going to. I DO NOT take the lids off. Two of the tubs have...OH!!! these pets do not have names...or if they do, I don't know what they are. Anyway, two of the tubs have...are you ready...scorpions. Yep...and when you shine a black light on them, they are the most incredible florescent green color...they glow-in-the-dark! It's awesome, BUT please leave the lid on...keep all hands and arms inside the bus and DO NOT TOUCH them...DO NOT DO THIS AT HOME!!! The other tub has a very nice tarantula. I'm not sure what type of amusement or entertainment these "pets" provide, but nevertheless, they are a part of the household. So...sadly, our interesting little home life will be coming to an end in the next few weeks...Bobby is leaving and going to a condo on a golf course...I am STILL househunting, ANOTHER   L  O  N  G, sordid story for yet another blog. When I find a home, I will be moving. It will be my sixth move in four years! I'm so over it!
I'm sure Jenny will LOVE having everyone's things gone. I know there are a few of my things here, a few of Bobby's things...Karin's things...Jess' things...and possibly things belonging to a couple of other people. SO, she will have her home back and it might be normal...for her. She has some awesome chairs she is collecting. She uses them in her photography business. A couple of them I might like...but she would know if they were missing.
So...on to another blog...